Sometimes as a mom, I wonder, “What am I doing wrong?”
And then there are times I want to say, “They don’t belong to me!”
And then there are the times I compare them to others.
But more often than not, I have moments where I am reminded that even in my weaknesses I am a mom who loves her boys, and can be proud of them.
Over the last two weeks my oldest was offered the opportunity to be a member of the student leadership team at his school. Right now, he helps younger children be certain they get to class on time. He in turn needs to be in class on time as well. As the year goes on, those duties will change, but he is excited to be a part of helping others. I am really proud of him. He heard about “This Thing” that his friends were doing, and he asked his teachers how it worked, and he applied and was accepted. Mind you, this is my socially awkward, hormonal preteen. He is happy to be helping others.
Remember me the special education turned preschool teacher? This moment was huge for him, and me. His father and I are so proud.
Meanwhile, today we received a letter from the school about my middle child in fourth grade. This letter:
He said as he handed it to me, “Mama, I got this letter today, and I think it is good, I hope it is good, but I didn’t read it. (his
best friend’s name not inserted here) got a letter too!”
He was excited, I was nervous…Is this a “Your son needs further help.” Letter? Was this a “Your son hit someone today.” Letter? But I was pleasantly surprised.
As a mom, I was happy that a teacher saw a quality in my child that he would work well with children who have special needs.
As a teacher, I say, “This is the moment where he discovers that he can help others around him. What if he decides Special Education is for him? How do I help him navigate that with him?”
I cannot express how happy I am that my children are excited to be leaders. Not just leaders, but leaders by example. They do not boss people around, but they do get to help others to find themselves. It is so important for us all to be able to find ourselves, but to help others to find themselves as well. Not leading others by telling them, but leading others by modeling how we find ourselves.
Leadership, it is not telling others what to do, it is getting in the trenches and demonstrating to others how you do it, and letting them do it alongside you. I am so grateful that my children have this opportunity to find themselves by helping others, and help others find themselves.
So grateful for the opportunity for them, and for the trust in their skills as leaders.
On the note of creating leaders:
Look at this awesome art that my oldest and youngest created! They have a reward system at their school that gives “Good Deed Tickets” to students who are doing the right thing. Their school picks two students a week from these “Tickets” to do a special art project. The youngest was picked in September, the oldest was picked in October. The middle is adamant he will never be picked, but then, he is a middle! (deep inside I pray he does, but I am prepared to create an art project at home if he doesn’t”) I know that my children are being recognized for the positive things they are doing, and that makes me really happy. I pray that as they grow they appreciate these opportunities to be leaders by example.